


The Pretender letter scene rewrite (comic script)

by Summer_Lime



Series: Comic Scripts for Animorphs Gender AU [3]
Category: Animorphs - Katherine A. Applegate
Genre: ? maybe, Alien Gender/Sexuality, Book 23: The Pretender, Comic Script, Constructive Criticism Welcome, For both Tobias and Aria, Gen, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Genderqueer Character, Nonbinary Character, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rewrite, Screenplay/Script Format, but i also understand why a trans person might take offense, he spent years as a human, i have to stick to the ones i own copies of, if all goes according to plan The Attack is up next, implied trans character in Elfangor calling himself Tobias' father, it makes sense to me, less of a fix-it than the others, look guys this is a comic first and a rewrite second, look i have a limited number of books at my disposal, okay, please tell me if having a trans alien is offensive, read the series if you want more on that, so welcome, the genderqueer character is Tobias, this is more of a supplemental, tobis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-07
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 23:28:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,146
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25773601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Summer_Lime/pseuds/Summer_Lime
Summary: This is a non-final draft of a script for a comic I'm planning. This is the letter scene from book 23. It's a lot subtler about the gender stuff than the others, but this is part of the AU.
Relationships: Elfangor-Sirinial-Shamtul/Loren (Animorphs), mentioned only
Series: Comic Scripts for Animorphs Gender AU [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1861939
Comments: 7
Kudos: 3





	The Pretender letter scene rewrite (comic script)

**Author's Note:**

> This might be the least changed so far. Tobias is given gender-neutral pronouns, and the descriptions are much more visual, but mostly I just want to draw my favorite scene from The Pretender.

**[OPENING SHOT OF TOBIAS, ARIA, AND DEGROOT IN SMALL OFFICE. TOBIAS AND ARIA ARE SITTING IN FRONT OF A DESK, WHILE DEGROOT SITS BEHIND IT. Should probably draw map beforehand. ANGLE IS FROM SLIGHTLY ABOVE, AND BEHIND DESK, AS IF FROM A SECURITY CAMERA]**

**SECOND PANEL** : [DEGROOT IS AT DESK, LOOKING AT AN OPEN FOLDER ON IT] DEGROOT: “‘Dear Tobias.’”

**THIRD, FOURTH, AND FIFTH PANELS** : [DEGROOT PAUSES (ellipsis over his head?), REACHES INTO COAT POCKET, AND PUTS ON PAIR OF READING GLASSES]

**SIXTH AND SEVENTH PANELS** : [DEGROOT IS HOLDING A PIECE OF PAPER UP, AND READING FROM IT IN SIXTH PANEL. ARIA IS STARING AT A BLANK-FACED TOBIAS IN THE SEVENTH. SPEECH BUBBLE IS BETWEEN THEM, AND ABOUT AS BIG AS A PANEL] “‘Dear Tobias. I am your father. You never knew me. And I never knew you. I do not know what your life has been over these many years. I hope that your mother found someone else to love. I know that all memory of me has been erased from her mind. All evidence of my time on Earth has been erased. I am being given this opportunity to communicate with you by the very creature who erased my life on Earth. They have called me back to my duty, and I cannot fail.’”

**EIGHTH PANEL** : [DEGROOT GLANCING UP AT TOBIAS] “‘This will all seem very strange to you, my unknown, unseen, unmet child. But I am not one of your people. I have taken on the form of a human, but I am not human.’”

**NINTH PANEL** : [ARIA IS LOOKING AT TOBIAS. TOBIAS’ FACE IS STILL CAREFULLY BLANK. Smaller pupils, maybe?] TOBIAS’ THOUGHT BUBBLE: “Not human!”

**TENTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS ROLLING THEIR EYES] TOBIAS, SPEECH BUBBLE DRIPPING WITH SARCASM: “Oh, man.”

**ELEVENTH PANEL** : [DEGROOT GLANCING AT ARIA, QUESTIONING]

**TWELFTH PANEL** : [DEGROOT, STILL RECITING, SQUINTS AT TOBIAS SUSPICIOUSLY] “‘I was in a terrible war. I did terrible things. I had to, I suppose. But I grew tired of war, so I ran away. I went and hid among the people of Earth. Among humans. While on Earth, and living as a human, I took the name Alan Fangor. I took on the name Alan Fangor, but my true name is Elfangor-Sirinal-Shamtul.’”

**THIRTEENTH PANEL** : [CLOSE-UP OF TOBIAS’ FACE, STILL BLANK, SLIGHTLY BORED-LOOKING. PUPILS ARE DEFINITELY SMALLER THAN NORMAL.] TOBIAS’ THOUGHT BUBBLE: “Elfangor! My father!”

**FOURTEENTH PANEL** : [SHOT SHOWING ALL THREE. ARIA IS GLARING AT TOBIAS.] 

**FIFTEENTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS SHRUGGING] “Is that it?”

**SIXTEENTH PANEL** : [ARIA LOOKS DISAPPOINTED. DEGROOT LOOKS A LITTLE SHOCKED] 

**SEVENTEENTH PANEL** : [DEGROOT LOOKS A BIT CONFUSED, BUT CONTINUES] “There’s more. ‘but my true name is Elfangor-Sirinal-Shamtul. And though you will never know me and we will never meet, I wanted to make sure that you knew my disappearance from your life was not by my choice. I wanted nothing more than to live out my life, loving your mother and loving you as well.’” 

**EIGHTEENTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS IN A CLOSE-UP AGAIN] TOBIAS’ THOUGHT BUBBLE: “But we did meet, Elfangor. We met as you lay dying. Did you know? Did you guess... _ Father? _ Did you sense, at the last, terrible moment when I had to leave you to the murderer who sits beside me, that I was your child?” [Note: I want to have genderqueer Tobias in this AU, but I don’t know if they’d know they weren’t a boy yet? Advice?]

**NINETEENTH PANEL** : [DEGROOT LOOKS ANNOYED. IS MUTTERING LAST PARAGRAPH. LOOKING DOWN AT DESK?] “‘But I was part of something larger than myself. I had my duty. There was a great evil I had to fight. There were lives I had to try and save. Including yours and your mother’s. I am from a race called Andalites. Duty is very important to us. As it is to many, many humans. I cannot say that I love you, my child, because I do not know you. But know that I wanted to love you. Know that, at least.’ It’s signed Elfangor-Sirinal-Shamtul, Prince.”

**TWENTIETH AND TWENTY-FIRST PANELS** : [TOBAIS BARKING OUT A HARSH LAUGH. THE TIGHT GRIN DOES NOT MEET THEIR EYES. TWENTY-FIRST PANEL THEY’RE STILL WEARING THE HUMORLESS GRIN. THEIR EYES LOOK TIRED] “Well, that figures, doesn’t it?”

**TWENTY-SECOND PANEL** : [ARIA LOOKS MIFFED] “What figures?”

**TWENTY-THIRD PANEL** : [TOBIAS’ FACE IS BACK TO LOOKING BLANKLY BORED] “My so-called ‘real father’ shows up and he’s some lunatic. Some idiot. Perfect. So: No money, right?”

**TWENTY-FOURTH PANEL** : DEGROOT, HEAD DIPPED SLIGHTLY IN A NOD: “No money.”

**TWENTY-FIFTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS STANDING UP, HANDS ON THIGHS]

**TWENTY-SIXTH PANEL** : TOBIAS, LOOKING OVER AT ARIA: “You really want to take me in, or were you just hoping I was going to inherit something?”

**TWENTY-SEVENTH PANEL** : ARIA, WITH A FALSELY SWEET SMILE THAT DOESN’T REACH HER EYES: “I do want to take you in. But it may have to wait just a little while. You see, I was suddenly called back to Africa to do some reshooting of...of some lions.”

**TWENTY-EIGHTH PANEL** : TOBIAS, WITH SARCASTIC GRIN [DOESN’T REACH THEIR EYES]: “Great. I have a nut for a father and a fake for a cousin.”

**TWENTY-NINTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS IS TURNED AROUND AND WALKING AWAY. ARIA AND DEGROOT ARE VISIBLE BEHIND THEM]

**THIRTIETH PANEL** : [TOBIAS IS CLOSER TO THE DOOR. ARIA IS REACHING OUT A HAND] ARIA: “Tobias.”

**THIRTY-FIRST PANEL** : [TOBIAS AT DOOR, LOOKING BACK AT VIEWER] “What?”

**THIRTY-SECOND PANEL** : [ARIA LOOKING SLIGHTLY NERVOUS, MAYBE DETERMINED?] “I...I knew your father. We were, shall we say, on opposite sides of certain issues. But he was no fool.”

**THIRTY-THIRD PANEL** : [ARIA SMILES SOFTLY, DISTANTLY. IT IS THE FIRST GENUINE SMILE THEY’VE SHOWN SO FAR] “Prince Elfangor-Sirinial-Shamtul was no fool. And the galaxy will not soon see his like again.”

**THIRTY-FOURTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS, LOOKING FRUSTRATED, HAS ONE HAND ON THE DOOR HANDLE, AND THE OTHER IN THE AIR IN APPARENT EXASPERATION] “Good grief, you’re as crazy as he was.”

**THIRTY-FIFTH AND THIRTY-SIXTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS WALKING THROUGH DOOR. WHEN TOBIAS IS CLOSING THE DOOR BEHIND THEM, TWO SPEECH BUBBLES ARE POPPING THROUGH] FIRST SPEECH BUBBLE, WHICH BELONGS TO DEGROOT: “Shouldn’t we take him? Just to be safe? Make him one of us?” SECOND SPEECH BUBBLE, WHICH BELONGS TO ARIA: “He’s street trash. A waste of a Yeerk. Elfangor would be ashamed. Their son should be a warrior. A worthy adversary, not some young fool. A pity, really.”

**[NOTE TO SELF: this panel should start a new page. There will be many page breaks in this comic, but this one is mandatory] THIRTY-SEVENTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS SPEED-WALKING DOWN A STREET]

**THIRTY-EIGHTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS MORPHING BEHIND A DUMPSTER. Still not sure how to do morphing panels, any help?]

**THIRTY-NINTH PANEL** : [TOBIAS FLYING]

**FORTIETH PANEL** : [TOBIAS LANDING ON THE GROUND OF THEIR MEADOW. Should draw a map beforehand]

**FORTY-FIRST PANEL** : [ANOTHER MORPHING PANEL, TO HUMAN AGAIN] 

  
**FORTY-SECOND PANEL** : [WIDE SHOT. TOBIAS IS KNEELING, HEAD IN HANDS. THEY ARE SHAKING WITH SOBS] 

**Author's Note:**

> If I made any mistakes, please tell me so. If you have advice on writing genderqueer characters, I've love to read anything you can tell me. 
> 
> And please, I REALLY don't know how to depict morphing in comic format


End file.
